


consistently you

by auroracalisto



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Depression, F/F, F/M, Mentions of accidents, One-Shots, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reader Insert, Suicidal Reader, possible trigger warning for some chapters, relationship, some chapters will have major character death, you - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:40:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 8,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23310046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/auroracalisto/pseuds/auroracalisto
Summary: "she wonders if he sits under the moon, thinking about her, too." [a.e.]a set of one-shots for criminal minds, with a quote at the beginning to describe each one shot.
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Reader, David Rossi/Reader, Emily Prentiss/Reader, Spencer Reid/Reader
Comments: 7
Kudos: 165





	1. safe [spencer reid]

**_“the responsibility of love: to keep another’s heart safe.” [bridgett devoue]_ ** **__ **

* * *

Staring at the documents in your hands, you could only wish that the answer would come to you. But it never did. 

The unsub had been leaving clues. Question marks, even. Much like how the Riddler would in the DC movies and comics you frequently saw. It puzzled you—and much of the team, as well. 

While Garcia hurriedly tried to pull the information together, to see what would fit together, nothing seemed to make sense. 

All except for the fact that the unsub’s type was you. Body type, race, eye color, hair color—scarily enough, even the age was spot on. 

It scared you a little bit. 

As you nervously scanned your eyes over the crime scene photos, a hand sat a cup of hot coffee down in front of you. 

You jumped a bit, looking up to see Reid giving you a worried look. 

“Hey,” he softly said, sitting down beside of you. “You look anxious.”

You shot him a look before you leaned back in your chair, running a hand over your face. You could feel the tension running through your body. “I am,” you admitted, taking the coffee. “Thank you,” you spoke, taking a sip, ignoring the pain of the scaling liquid sliding down your throat. If that was the worst thing that happened today, you would be okay with that. 

Reid frowned, moving to look at the papers you had in front of you. “You should let me take care of this. You could talk to the victims’ families—”

“That’s JJ’s job,” you said, moving to look at the pictures with him, “and plus, don’t think the agent who looks like their loved one is gonna be much of a comfort, Spence.”

He made a face that you knew meant he understood where you were coming from. He gave you a bit of a smile, looking at the clues on the pictures. His smile fell and turned into a frown as he suddenly flipped one of the picture’s upside down. 

He hurriedly grabbed the phone from the center of the table and called Garcia, putting it on the speaker as soon as he did. 

“What can I do for you, my lovelies?” Penelope’s sweet voice sounded. 

“Garcia,” Spencer began, “how many fishing ports are near the station?”

“Let’s see . . . well, you’re in Massachusetts. There are tons—”

“I know that.”

“Alright, alright, Boy Wonder, the closest one to you guys is in New Bedford. Why did you need to know?”

“Can you send that to everyone? I know where our next victim is,” he said, quickly standing up with the picture in hand. 

You stared at him in confusion and he looked straight at you. 

“It’s not a question mark,” he said. 

Your face grew pale and you stood up as well, quickly grabbing the keys for one of the SUVs. “It’s a fishhook,” you said. Realization struck you like a freight train. He was holding the victims at a fishing port and disposing of the bodies in the water. How could you be so blind? 

Hurriedly, you grabbed your coat. But before you could pull it on, Spencer took ahold of your arm. 

He pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, your eyes growing wide as he did so. 

“Stay here,” he looked at you, taking the keys away from you. “I can’t risk you getting hurt.”

You frowned but gave a small nod. “If—if you insist,” you replied, seeing as Spencer flashed you a soft smile. 

“I’ll be back.”


	2. don't blame yourself [aaron hotchner]

_**“you will forever own a piece of me that I can never take back.” [unknown]** _

__

* * *

March 8th, 2012  
7:18 PM

**aaron** I miss you

March 21st, 2012  
3:31 AM

**aaron** I wish you were still here

April 7th, 2012  
9:15 PM

**aaron** Jack keeps asking about you. I don’t know what I’m supposed to tell him.

May 1st, 2012  
11:11 AM

**aaron** I visited the hospital today. You are still asleep. I left flowers.

May 5th, 2012  
6:59 PM

**aaron** It’s been two months. I’m keeping your phone on. 

May 25th, 2012  
7:11 PM

**aaron** Everyone is asking about you. Emily wants to know what we’re going to do for your birthday. I couldn’t give her an answer. 

June 5th, 2012  
8:19 PM

**aaron** [Your name], I really need you. Tomorrow is your birthday. It makes three months since your accident. Please. Please wake up.

* * *

Aaron stared down at his phone, his breath hitching in his throat when he saw the three dots show up where you were supposed to be typing. Not possible. You were in a coma. You were still in a coma. 

* * *

July 16th, 2012  
10:17 AM

**[your name]** Aaron

* * *

He gripped onto his phone, his eyes wide.

* * *

July 16th, 2012  
10:19 AM

**[your name]** Hospital will call soon. Told me to stay off my phone. My brother is here. Texting for me. Please come.

* * *

Aaron read the message. He didn’t hesitate to get to his feet, calling Jack’s aunt, Jessica, to come and watch him until he was able to bring him to the hospital. Jessica was there in a matter of minutes and Aaron was rushing out to his car. The hospital called to tell him that his [Your name] was awake. He let them know that he was on his way. 

Aaron could hardly breathe. He couldn’t believe that you were waking up. 

* * *

July 16th, 2012  
10:25 AM

**[your name]** This is [your nickname]’s brother. Room B214. Second floor. 

* * *

Aaron, again, didn’t reply. He pulled into a parking spot and did not take his time when running up to the said hospital room. He practically threw the door open, seeing you sitting in the hospital bed, a small water cup with a straw in your hands. Your eyes widened when you saw him. You put the cup on the tray and watched as Aaron came over to you. 

“I seen your messages,” you softly spoke, holding your arms out to him as he came close. 

He enveloped you in his arms and held back the tears threatening to spill. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I was supposed to keep you safe. I’m the reason we got into the accident—“

“No, no, Aaron,” you looked up at him, cupping his cheeks. “Don’t.. don’t blame yourself. I’m awake now. Let’s focus on that,” you said, watching him with soft eyes. 

Aaron let out a soft, shaky breath before he once again pulled you close to his chest. He lost you once. He wasn’t about to let you go anytime soon. 


	3. i love you [emily prentiss]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so maybe someone will get a kick out of this but i didn't realize that i was using quotes, ya know, like at the ending of every criminal minds episode. i like. it just dawned on me. i guess subconsciously i knew and that's why you see the one-shot series in front of you, but i'll be damned if i don't believe that i'm not as dumb as i thought i was. like. what. even. how did i not realize? ANYWAY. i hope you guys are liking this so far! if you want to request anything, feel free too. i also take requests on my Tumblr, under the same handle!

_**** _

_**“do you still love me?” [unknown]** _

* * *

Emily stared at you for a moment, disbelief written in her soft features. 

“What was that?” she softly asked, sitting down beside you on your shared bed. 

“I said, do you still love me?” you kept your eyes on hers. 

“What kind of question is that?” Emily asked, pressing her hands to your cheeks. Her lips parted and she went to say something else, but she only stopped herself. She didn’t understand where all of this was coming from. 

You sniffled softly and leaned against the woman’s hands. “Just . . . I just need to hear you say it. Please, Emily,” you looked up at her, your eyes filling with tears. 

Her eyes widened and she nodded. “I love you, [Your name], now and forever,” she tightly hugged onto you. “[Your name], why would you ever doubt that?”

You hugged her back, letting your chin rest on her shoulder. “I . . . I just need to hear you say it sometimes. I just need—I just need to know.”

Emily pulled back and cupped your cheeks once more, her thumb gently brushing against your bottom lip. She leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. 

“I love you. I’m sorry if I don’t say it enough.”

“I love you, too, Em.”


	4. it'll be okay [david rossi]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOT A HAPPY CHAPTER

_**“I smiled. We were under the same sky, at least.” [unknown]** _

* * *

You remembered what it felt like to fall in love with David. The two of you were twenty-something year old’s, just trying to figure out life and how to make the job work. Never once did you disclose your feelings with him. You felt like he would be better off without knowing how you felt—he didn’t need any distractions. He was one of the best and you wanted him to do his best. 

When he set out for his early retirement in the late 90s, you had given him a picture of the team and a silver flask that could easily be hidden in any sort of pocket. He had laughed about both of them and the only thing that you could think about was how it made your heart flutter.

You stayed with the team. Despite so many leaving and transferring, you stayed. Even up until the point that David came out of his retirement in 2007, to come back to the BAU. You were there. 

David seemed happy to see you. He would never have said it out loud, but it was obvious he was. 

Your heart was forever heavy. Here you were, in your fifties, and you have yet to tell David, the man you have loved since you were younger, that you were in love with him. It was quite sad. 

Sometimes, Reid would tease you about how you were the only one to call David by his first name and not Rossi, as everyone else did. But to you, he was David. He was an agent, sure, but he would always be David first. 

So, when the time came that the two of you would be searching for the unsub together, it never dawned on you that it might be your last. It was like that until you heard a loud bang and felt immediate pain in your abdomen. The shot was followed by a second and the unsub had collapsed; David was running over to you, calling for back up and for a medic. Anything. 

He quickly got to your side and pulled you close, keeping a hand on your wound. “You need to put pressure on it—”

You looked up at the man, your vision growing hazy. You took in a deep breath and pressed a hand to his cheek. “Dave,” you softly spoke, grimacing through the pain. 

David looked down at you, tears pooling in his eyes. 

“It’s okay,” you breathed out, looking up towards the sky as you drew your last breath. 

You never told him. But that was okay. Because you were never truly alone. He had always been right there, even if he wasn’t. 


	5. adore you [aaron hotchner]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @amy-de-l-abc on Tumblr: Something that includes the reader getting along splendidly with Jack and maybe like...Hotch sees that and suddenly realizes he's attracted to her? Or something? But yeah, adorable Reader & Jack interaction!

**“my darling, all I want is to chase beautiful dreams with you.” [alexandra vasiliu]**

****

* * *

Hotch quietly sat on his couch, reading some files for a couple of cases. His eyes traced the words to the point that the ink blended. There was no point in continuing—he wouldn’t be able to focus. He could hear Jack yelling from the front yard. A frown graced his lips, but he soon relaxed once he heard your joyful laugh, followed by the barking of your sweet Border Collie puppy. 

Hotch hesitated for a moment before he went to see what his son and neighbor were up to, carrying a couple of bottles of water with him. 

He stood in the doorway as Jack laughed and hugged onto the puppy. You clutched onto the leash, smiling and bending down to Jack’s height. Jack absolutely loved having you for a neighbor. Any time you had ice cream, you shared some with Jack. Any time you had a cookout, you invited your neighbors, Jack, and his dad. There were so many things that you did for Jack and his dad. Jack adored you. And as Hotch watched as you got your puppy to calm down so she wouldn’t keep jumping on top of his son, he realized that he, too, adored you. 

Jack smiled and sat down in the grass beside you. He leaned against your lap, asking question after question. “Is she why you’ve been gone all weekend?” he asked.

You smiled and nodded. “My cousin in Ohio had a bunch of puppies. She asked me if I wanted one, and I said yes. I had to drive all the way there, Jack!”

“All the way?! Why didn’t you just fly? My dad flies to a lot of places!” Jack grinned. 

You admired how Jack was always so talkative about his dad. He once told you that his dad was his hero. That warmed your heart and caused the little crush you had on your neighbor increase every time you saw him home. 

“Well, it would have been faster,” you laughed, “But sometimes, you just need to drive. And I would have had to pay extra for my puppy to come with me—”

“Water?” Aaron asked, holding out a bottle to you and Jack. 

A smile overcame you, immediately. “Yes, please. Thanks, Aaron,” you said, taking the water bottle from him. 

Jack grinned and took the other from his dad, watching as he sat down in front of the two of you. 

Hotchner smiled softly, more towards you at the moment. “[Your name], I was wondering . . .” he began, waiting to see if you were paying attention.

You smiled and nodded for him to continue. 

“I, uh,” he cleared his throat. You handed Jack your puppy’s leash and he took the opportunity to get up and run around with the puppy. Aaron smiled and looked back at him, a soft sigh escaping his lips. “Would you—I—I am making chicken parmesan,” he said, his eyes not meeting yours, a clear sign of how nervous he was. “Would you want to stay? For dinner?”

You giggled softly and nodded. “You know, Aaron, I thought you’d never ask.”


	6. safe pt 2 [spencer reid]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @amy-de-l-abc on Tumblr: Spence x Reader - maybe a sequel to the first chapter in your story? Idk, you can pretty much do what you like with it, but if you want more idea than that... Maybe like... Reader thinks she's figured something out that they didn't see before and that whoever's going to get the unsub is walking into a trap; she rushes to their "rescue" and finds the unsub is two steps ahead, has been counting on them figuring it out, and is, in fact, leading HER into a trap. Spence realizes this at some point after arriving to find an empty fishing port, and has to go rescue Reader. Or something, idk haha. Like I said, I'm cool with whatever you come up with...I just preferably want to see a love confession somewhere in there XD

**"choose people who choose you." [unknown]**

****

* * *

You knew it. 

As soon as Spencer had left the police station, your phone had rung. It came from an unknown number. You answered it, listening to heavy breathing before someone finally spoke. The voice came from what sounded like a young girl, crying and in pain. 

“Please help me,” she cried. “The people—” she lowered her voice to a whisper, “—the people who took me say you need to come. You only. They—oh, please, help me, I’m so scared.”

Your blood ran cold. You could hear the fear in her soft voice. 

“They—they keep saying they’re going to leave me here,” she cried. 

“What?” you quickly spoke. “Where are you?”

“I—” the girl took in a deep breath before she spoke once more. “Look at the hook.”

“The hook?” you furrowed your eyebrows, flinching as the line went dead. That was never a good sign, but how did she know about the hook? You let it slip your mind and stared at it. Your breath hitched in your throat when you realized that yes, while it was a hook, it was an octopus hook. You wracked your mind trying to think of what it could mean. Ocean, yes. Intelligence? An octopus could represent intelligence. 

Grabbing your phone once more, you dialed Garcia’s number. Before she could say much of anything, you spoke. “Are there any libraries around the precinct?”

You heard her fingers typing away. 

“Yes, my lovely, there’s an abandoned one five minutes away from you. Why?”

“Can you send me the coordinates?”

“Of course, I can. What’s going on?”

“I don’t know, Garc, thanks for the help,” you quickly hung up and grabbed your coat and your guns before you took off running to one of the SUVs. You punched in the numbers on the GPS and took off driving. You didn’t hesitate and you didn’t call anyone. 

Garcia had called Hotch to tell him what you were doing. That was only after Reid had called him to tell him that he and Prentiss found the fishing port, but there was nothing there. Sure, it was definitely the disposal sight. But there was no one around for miles. Information spread quickly between the team members. 

And Spencer? He felt like his body was on fire. Spencer called and called your phone but to no avail. He felt as if he would have been sick. 

* * *

In only a matter of time, several SUVs along with the one you had taken were parked in front of an abandoned library. You hadn’t waited. And Spencer’s anxiety had skyrocketed. 

You glared at the two men and the woman in front of you. The woman had posed as a young girl when she called. In fact, she even laughed at your eagerness to help. 

“You really should have thought twice about coming here,” she rolled her eyes. You were gagged and tied to a chair. “But oh, poor Spencer, he’s had this coming for a long time.”

You looked at her in confusion. 

“Oh, you wouldn’t know. You’re the newest member to the team, hm? But Spencer loves you.” She laughed. “Did he tell you how he killed my father right in front of me? Isn’t that wonderful? How a man you’re supposed to trust literally could kill you in an instant?”

What the trio didn’t anticipate was that the team wasn’t up for waiting, either. They called for backup but rushed inside the abandoned library. They searched everywhere and found you in the archives of the old building. 

Your eyes were filled with tears, but you never once let them spill. Spencer saw you and he felt his anger boil. But it only worsened as he saw the girl who’d he had apologized to, so many times in the past. 

“Hands where I can see them!” Hotchner shouted from beside of Reid. 

The girl smirked and watched them closely. When she truly believed they were not paying attention, she pulled out a gun and aimed it at you. That’s when you heard a gunshot.

But the pain you expected never came. The girl was on the ground, bleeding out, and her two cronies gave up instantaneously. 

Letting out a sob, you could only watch as Spencer put away his gun and ran over to you. He quickly pulled your gag off and moved to take off the bindings. 

“What the hell happened?” he quickly asked. “Why didn’t you call me?” 

Spencer came around and cupped your cheeks, tears in his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell anyone what you were doing? Why did you let me leave if you knew what was going to happen?”

“I didn’t know,” you quickly said, trying to stifle your sobs. Your arms suddenly made their way around his neck and you tightly hugged him. “Spence, I’m so sorry,” you whispered, burying your tear-stained face into his chest. 

“No, no, don’t apologize. I’m just . . . I’m so thankful nothing bad happened to you. I don’t know what I would do if you died,” he whispered. “I—I love you, so much, [Your name].”

Your heart pounded in your chest as your grip on his shirt tightened. “Spence,” you looked up at him. “I . . . I love you, too. I love you, too.”


	7. not alone, never alone [spencer reid]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @amy-de-l-abc on Tumblr.  
> I hope this is somewhat what you were looking for! I tried my hardest to incorporate everything you asked for. I was thinking of making this multiple chapters but decided to include it in one chapter so it's gonna be super long (hope you don't mind). Also, just to let you know, the reader and Spencer do end up together in the end. So. That's a plus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING:  
> It is very possible that the content within this chapter can be triggering for some audiences. Read at your own caution.  
> And please, if you ever feel like you need help, do not be afraid to reach out. Things like the messages in this story are purely fictional and would most likely not happen if one was seeking help.  
> There are multiple contact numbers for suicide hotlines, and they are very easy to search up.  
> Here is a link for international hotlines: http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html  
> And here is a link for the United States hotlines: http://www.suicide.org/suicide-hotlines.html  
> Do not ever be afraid to reach out. You are never alone.

**"my biggest fear is that eventually, you will see me the way I see myself." [anonymous]**

* * *

[Your name] sat, nervously picking at the fuzzies on her sweater. Her knee bounced up and down as she chewed on her lip, her eyes glancing towards the clock every now and then. She needed to speak with her therapist, Julia, and the wait was agonizingly long. If she didn’t get in soon, JJ will be calling her and telling her to be ready for another job. And she couldn’t wait much longer to talk with her therapist. 

A woman poked her head out from the office and smiled gingerly towards the nervous girl. “You can come in now, Miss. I am so sorry for the wait,” she opened the door. 

[Your name] stood and came in, giving her a faint smile. “It’s okay,” she softly spoke. 

“Do you have children?” her therapist smiled. 

“No. I’m not in a relationship,” she shrugged, sitting down in the chair across from the woman. 

“Oh.” She smiled. “Anyone would be lucky to have you, [Your name].” She got out some files to look through as she spoke, “Do you remember my son Evan? Well, he’s been acting up in school again. After our meeting, I’ll have to go and pick him up from school.”

[Your name]’s eyes widened and she felt her chest tighten. _Am I seriously taking up her time?_ she thought to herself before she forced a smile in her doctor’s direction. “Thank you for letting me stay,” she mumbled. 

Julia rose an eyebrow. “Of course, [Your name],” she softly spoke and grabbed her pen. “Now. Do you remember what we went over the last time you were here?”

It was just last Tuesday. Of course, she remembered. [Your name] nodded. 

“Alright, good,” Julia smiled. “How have you been doing? Has anything worked for you?”

Julia had given her some stuff to do whenever she felt herself losing control. She had the rubber band on her wrist hidden underneath her sweater sleeve. Pursing her lips, she gave a small nod. “I think so.”

“Really?” Julia grinned, proud of her patient. “That’s great!”

Another forced smile made it’s way to [Your name]’s lips and she turned her gaze onto her buzzing phone. _No,_ constantly ran through her brain as she tried to silence the call.

“Do you need to take that?” Julia tilted her head.

“No,” she quickly replied, only to flinch when there was another call. 

Julia expectantly smiled at her. “You can answer the call. It’s okay.”

[Your name] frowned and closed her eyes as she answered the phone. “Hello?”

“[Your name]?” 

It was JJ. 

“Yes, I’m here.”

“We have another job. You’re gonna need to come in. I’m so sorry, I know that you have your appointment, but this can’t wait.”

“Fine,” she frowned, letting out a soft sigh. “I’m across town. I’ll be a second,” she mumbled before she hung up, looking at Julia. 

Julia watched her with soft eyes. “What was that about?”

“I have to go. Looks like Evan’s gonna get in trouble sooner than later,” she tried to joke as she got to her feet, stuffing her phone back in her pocket. “Thank you for meeting with me. You don’t care if I call you later, do you?”

“Not at all, dear,” Julia smiled. “Just message me so I’ll be able to go somewhere quiet. Be safe, [Your name].”

[Your name] smiled and left her therapist’s office, her chest as tight as it was before. 

* * *

“You made it,” JJ smiled as [Your name] walked into the briefing room. 

[Your name] nodded to JJ, returning her smile, before she sat down beside Emily and Spencer. She didn’t look at them, glancing towards the files sat in front of her. 

Spencer glanced towards his friend with a concerned expression, but he didn’t say anything. [Your name] never told him much of her home life—or her life, in general. He frowned and leaned back in his chair as Penelope came in, immediately talking about the case. 

“You all remember the choking game case we had a while back?” Penelope asked, looking back at the group. She was aware that [Your name] had not been apart of the team at that time, but let out a relieved sigh when [Your name] nodded to say that she knew what it was about. 

“Alright,” Penelope continued, “it looks like we have another one similar to that. There are children in New York committing suicide—at least, that’s what NYPD is ruling it as for the moment. From what I have been able to see, there is a database their webcam videos are going to and showing that thousands of children are viewing these videos.”

[Your name] was tense in her chair.

“NYPD has requested our help,” Penelope said, looking towards Hotch. 

Hotch gave a small nod. “And we’ve accepted the case. Wheels up in thirty, everyone,” he said, casting a glance towards [Your name]. He stood and gathered his things, everyone else doing the same and grabbing their go-bags. 

* * *

It was quiet on the plane ride. They had already debriefed what information they had, so everyone was just preparing for what was to come.

[Your name] sat in the corner of the plane, holding her phone in front of her, typing away. 

**[Your name]**

I just feel like everything I do is pointless. I can’t talk to anyone about this.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

I’m sorry to hear you say that. Please, tell me more. I promise you, everything that you do has meaning. It has a purpose.

**[Your name]**

Yeah, but that’s the thing. I feel like it doesn’t. I had to leave my therapist today because of my job. I feel like I’m drowning. I can’t even have an hour to myself. Everything is just throwing up in front of me.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

I am sure your job would understand if you decided to take some time off. Is that what seems to be the problem?  
 **[Your name]**

No, that’s not the problem. Well, not all of it. I just. I don’t want to be here. I feel like everyone would be better without me.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

I can assure you, that is not the case. You have a purpose. You have a reason for being here, just like everyone else does. Are you with people right now? I am listening to you, if not. You are not alone.

**[Your name]**

I am with people right now.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

Are you going to hurt yourself? If you are, please remind yourself that you are okay. Everything is okay.

**[Your name]**

It’s not okay, but I am not going to hurt myself.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

You are aware that this is a suicidal hotline, correct?

**[Your name]**

Yes, I am aware.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

You’ve messaged a suicidal hotline and you’re not going to hurt yourself? Is that what you are saying?  
 **[Your name]**

Yes.

**[SUICIDAL HOTLINE]**

Alright. Please seek real-life help. A suicidal hotline will not help you if you aren’t going to hurt yourself.

**[Your name]**

Wait

**[Your name]**

But I want to talk. I want someone to just listen to me. I thought this hotline was supposed to do that. You’re supposed to help everyone.

**[Your name]**

Hello?

[Your name] felt her heart drop. No one would help her. Shortly before her text messages with the hotline, she had messaged her therapist and canceled their future appointments. Maybe it was too rushed, but [Your name] knew she was just wasting Julia’s time. She knew it. 

The plane soon landed, and everyone was ushered to the SUVs. It was only a matter of time before they reached the precinct. Everything there was already set up and [Your name] and Spencer was left behind to deal with the paper trail and information that was already available to them. Everyone else had gone out to interview the victim’s families and to the crime scenes. 

Spencer looked towards [Your name] with soft eyes. Mascara was underneath her eyes, not very noticeable, but noticeable if you looked close enough. _She must have been crying,_ he told himself, sitting across from her with a can of her favorite soda. He took notice of things. He couldn’t help it. 

“How are you feeling?” he softly asked the woman.

She rose an eyebrow, thanking him for the soda as he handed it to her. “I’m okay,” she softly mumbled, opening the soda and taking a sip of it. Her eyes never once met his, but she was grateful for his company. 

The two got to work on the case, helping each other out when it was needing.

* * *

Three days went by before they returned home. 

[Your name] was stressed. Her skin felt like it was on fire. Looking out the window of her apartment, she took a seat on her couch and held her cup of hot chocolate close to her chest. She sniffled and sipped at her steaming drink, her phone buzzing beside of her. 

It was her sibling. They kept messaging about how [Your name] should visit them and her parents soon. But she didn’t want to. She loved her family, yes, but . . . she was just a burden to them. 

_If I go, if I break down in front of them, it’ll be hell,_ she frowned to herself. _They can’t even handle me when I’m not depressed._

[Your name] ignored her sibling’s messages and closed her eyes, jumping a bit when her phone began to ring. She looked at it and the contact read ‘Spencer.’ She furrowed her eyebrows, a bit confused, but she answered the call and sat her mug down, anyway. 

“[Your name]?” Spencer greeted. She could practically hear his smile in his voice. 

“Spence? It’s ten o’clock, why are you calling?”

“Um, I just, I was just wanting to make sure you were okay. I . . . may have seen some of your messages yesterday. You left your phone open under the suicidal hotline.”

[Your name] felt her heart stop. “What? You read my messages?”

“No! Well—well, I mean, I didn’t mean to, [Your name],” he quickly said. “I was just . . . are you okay?”  
Just that morning, she had run into an old friend from her graduating class. They had spoken fondly of their memories together, even going as far as talking about their wellbeing nowadays. [Your name] mentioned just briefly how she had been seeing a therapist and her friend had asked her, “Don’t depressed people usually sleep all day? You really don’t look depressed.” The thought returned to her and she felt hot tears begin to form. 

“Spence, I really don’t wanna talk right now—”

“[Your name],” he softly spoke, a deep frown on his lips. “Can I—can I do something for you? I haven’t eaten yet. Maybe I can pick up some take out and come to your apartment. Is that okay? I—I really just want to talk to you, [Your name].”

She nervously rubbed her hands over her pajama pants before she gave a small nod. When she realized he couldn’t see it, she spoke, “Yes. But—but I’m not changing. I’m ready for bed. So just . . . just text me when you get here.”

Spencer smiled a bit to himself. “I’ll be there, soon. Don’t do anything, okay?” he asked. 

“Okay.”

* * *

**[Spencer]**

I’m at your door. Can you let me in?

[Your name] didn’t answer, but she got up from her spot on the couch and turned her television off, going to answer the door. 

She gave Spencer a weak smile, moving away so he could come in. 

“I hope you like Chinese,” he said. 

She gave a small nod. “I’ll get plates and silverware. Go ahead and take it to the living room,” [Your name] looked at Spencer for a moment, a soft blush forming on her cheeks. He was the first one from the team who had been in her apartment. 

[Your name] went to her kitchen to grab the dinnerware, making sure to grab a couple of sodas just in case Spencer didn’t pick up anything to drink. When she came back to the living room, Spencer had already set up all the food for them. 

He glanced up and smiled softly at the woman. “Hey,” he said. 

“Hey,” she replied, sitting down the plates and the sodas. 

Spencer hesitated for a moment before he spoke up again. “Are you okay?”

[Your name] stared at him, a frown evident on her features. 

“You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong. But—but I just don’t want you to be alone, [Your name],” he quickly spoke. “No one deserves to be alone when they’re hurting. When . . . when I was, well, it was a couple of years ago—anyway, when I wasn’t well, I was alone. I didn’t let anyone in. Please, [Your name], don’t block everyone out. No one deserves to be alone,” he said, taking in a deep breath, “Especially you.” He mumbled that last part, but she caught it. 

The blush that had left her cheeks moments before had returned. 

“What?” she softly asked, keeping her eyes on his. 

“You don’t deserve to be alone,” he said, returning his gaze. He frowned at her and momentarily ran his hand through his hair before realizing that he had messed it up. He let out a sigh, not moving to fix it. 

Instead, [Your name] found herself reaching forward and fixing it for him. She, however, wasn’t smiling. She was fighting her tears. She wasn’t about to cry in front of him. At least, that’s what she told herself.

_Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry._

Spencer cracked a soft smile. “It’s okay,” he said. Hesitantly, he hugged onto the woman. He was visibly uncomfortable with the new touch, but he didn’t dare pull away. This made her tears form quicker and a couple even fell. Spencer was making himself uncomfortable . . . for her. 

* * *

The following Monday was the same as it usually was. [Your name] was upset once more, but she had the day off. She was even expecting to spend it alone. That was until she got a message from Spencer.

**[Spencer]**

Hey.

**[Spencer]**

So, I am sorry if you’re not awake, but if you are, can you let me in your apartment? I picked up breakfast. I figured since we all have the day off, you’re not doing anything.

**[Spencer]**

Sorry if I assumed wrong. But I don’t want you to be alone.

[Your name] smiled a bit to herself as she read the message. She tossed her phone on her couch and slowly pulled herself off of it, going to the door. Unlocking it, she saw Spencer with a bag of her favorite breakfast food. She blushed. He truly remembered a lot of the things she did at the office. Like constantly bringing in breakfast biscuits and hashbrowns. 

Spencer gave her a soft smile. “Hey.”

“Hey,” [Your name] said. 

_He’s just here cause he pities you._

[Your name] swallowed thickly before she let the man in. “You know you didn’t have to come.”

“But I did,” he said, looking over at her.

[Your name] tilted her head, leading him into the kitchen. She expected him to continue. Spencer sat the bag on the countertop. 

“Breakfast. And, uh, I needed to tell you something. I’ve been thinking about it for some time now, and I just can’t stop thinking about it. I understand if you don’t feel the same, but I know how you feel about yourself and I just need to tell you before something happens, if it does end up happening—”

“Spence, what is it?” she softly asked, interrupting his tangent. 

“Okay, right,” he closed his eyes for a moment. “I—” he looked at her, his eyes softening their gaze. He smiled a bit. He knew he needed to tell her. “I really like you, [Your name]. And I understand if you don’t feel the same. I understand that you don’t even know where your head is, sometimes, but really, I just needed to tell you so you knew—” he gripped at the edge of his shirt, “—I really needed to tell you so you knew that you would never be alone. Even if you don’t feel the same, I really just needed you to—”

[Your name] interrupted him with a soft kiss to his lips, fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill. 

“Spencer,” she softly said, “Thank you.”

His eyes widened a bit as he stared her down. “What—do you—”

She nodded and kissed him again, hesitantly wrapping her arms around his neck. He copied the stance and pulled her close for a moment. He soon reached his hands up and wiped her tears away with his thumbs. 

“I am so sorry you feel the way you do. But you’re not alone. You are never alone. I promise you that,” he said, keeping his eyes on hers. 

“Thank you,” she repeated, giving him a tight hug. She buried her face in his chest, taking in a deep breath. 

Her family might be unable to care properly for her. Therapy might not be able to help her. But . . . now she had Spencer. Maybe that’s not exactly what she needed, but it was a start. He would be there, now. That . . . had to be enough. 

[Your name] looked up at Spencer one last time, admiring his features. 

For the first time in a long time, she truly felt like she wasn’t alone. 


	8. i'm here [aaron hotchner]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Requested by @amy-de-l-abc on Tumblr: Hotch x Reader - Idky but the idea of the strong Hotch just kinda losing it and ending up crying and Reader comforting him is... strangely fascinating? Haha idk. Again, this could totally be a sequel, or it could be a separate story--whatever you wanna do!

**“every day I love you a little bit more.” [karan gulia]**

* * *

The house was quiet.

Jack was with his aunt Jessica, and Aaron was in the living room. [Your name] was in the kitchen, cleaning up from the meal that they had finished just a couple of minutes ago. 

Just minutes after [Your name] put the last dish in the dishwasher, she looked over and saw that Aaron was standing in the doorway. A deep frown had made its way to Aaron’s face. 

Tilting her head, she shut the dishwasher and wiped her hands off on a hand towel. 

“Can’t find anything on TV?” she asked, pulling on a smile to try and chase his frown away. 

“[Your name], why do you stay with me?”

That completely threw her off. 

[Your name] looked at him in confusion. “What?”

“Why are you with me?” he asked, his heart pounding in his chest. “Why haven’t you left yet?”

“Aaron,” she said, coming over to stand in front of him. “I love you. Why would I leave you?”

“Haley did,” he blurted, his frown never leaving. “So has everyone else who's ever been with me. But you’re still here. I can’t figure it out,” he said, his shoulders heaving as he took in a breath. “I can’t figure out why you’re still here.”

[Your name] frowned and cupped his cheeks. “Aaron—”

He placed his hands over hers. [Your name]’s eyes widened in alarm when she saw that he had begun to cry. 

“Aaron, I won’t leave you,” she said. “I’m not about to leave you.”

Aaron wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug. [Your name] returned the hug, burying her face in his chest for a moment. 

“You’re the love of my life,” she admitted, her fingers gripping at his shirt. “I will always be here for you.”

Aaron looked down at her and rested his chin on the top of her head. “I love you, [Your name].”

The woman held onto him, rubbing small circles on his back as he slowly began to calm down. 

“Nothing will ever drive me away. I’m here until the end, okay?” she spoke, feeling him nod. She frowned to herself and stayed still, listening to his heartbeat. Her grip tightened and she felt his tense body eventually relax. 


	9. us [spencer reid]

_**"we never had to force love. we were drowning in it the moment we met." [paul perry]** _

* * *

Spencer smiled, his fingers lacing with yours. "You look exhausted," he softly spoke. 

You rose an eyebrow, your other hand pressing up against your rounded belly. "I'm six months pregnant with twins, Spencer. I think it'd be odd if I wasn't tired."

Spencer couldn't help his excited smile. He rested his head against your shoulder, quiet for just a moment. He placed his hands over the top of yours, listening as you took in a deep breath. You positioned yourself in a more comfortable manner as you rested up against him. 

He grinned and looked at you. "I can feel them kicking..."

"They will do that," you let out a soft laugh. "Remember, they—"

"—a fetus will start kicking at five months, or eighteen to twenty weeks. During a first pregnancy, they normally go unnoticed early on. But where you're pregnant with twins, it happens far more often," he smiled, sitting up to watch you. 

You smiled at Spencer and you leaned forward to kiss his cheek. "You're such a dork."

He blushed and looked away. "I'm just telling you what I know."

You smiled and took hold of his hand. 

You had joined the team a couple of months after Emily had left, the first time. The two of you created a type of relationship dynamic that just felt right—everything with Spencer just felt right. The two of you never had to force anything. 

A year into your relationship, you had gotten pregnant. You both only assumed it was one child, but by the time that the ultrasound came back and you saw that you were having twins, the love you and Spencer felt for each other only heightened. 

Leaning over, Spencer grabbed his phone, seeing Hotch had sent a text message through the group chat. He sighed softly and you suddenly pulled him back onto the bed with you, smiling. 

"Lay with me. For just a minute longer," you said, your arms wrapping around his body. 

Spencer grinned. "I'll have to leave. Hotch said you could come, but you'll just have to work with Garcia."

"That's fine. Just... until we really have to leave. Hold us."

"Us?"

Spencer was blushing. You looked up at him, letting out a soft giggle. "Yes. Us."

Spencer smiled and laid back with you. "You know I wouldn't do this for just anyone..."

"I sure hope not!"

His blush was unmistakable now.

"Not what I meant," he rolled his eyes, smiling a bit. He leaned over and kissed your cheek. "Okay. Our minute is up. Let's get ready and go."


	10. tragic backstories [spencer reid]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow not me disappearing for months,,,, i write more on my tumblr. it's under the same handle. but I'm gonna try to post more on here, too, especially with this piece

_**"if you have been brutally broken, but still have the courage to be gentle to others then you deserve a love deeper than the ocean itself." [nikita gill]** _

* * *

"Spencer, please tell me you know why [Your name] doesn't date anyone," she said, sitting down beside the agent. 

Spencer eyed JJ with a confused expression. He had no idea what she was talking about. 

"Oh, God, Spence," she closed her eyes for just a moment. "Okay. But you didn't hear this from me. And this is just so you can't ask her why she doesn't have a date, okay?"

"I wasn't going to—"

"—you still need to know."

Shutting up, Spencer sat his book down and listened to JJ. The other team members all quieted down, and Morgan kept watch to make sure you didn't come back out of Hotch's office anytime soon. 

"She used to be engaged. Like. It was a three-year engagement. They were at their wedding, and his ex, who he was cheating on [Your name] with, showed up and shot her fiancé right in front of her and then shot herself. Murder-suicide. It was all over the news for some time. She decided to become an agent after that, and I'm... not too sure if that's her actual reason, but..."

Morgan had stopped looking at the wrong time. 

You had come up and listened to the rest of JJ's story, sending her a smile when she realized you were there. 

"I mean, yeah, I would say that's the reason," you let out a soft laugh. JJ went to apologize for gossiping, but you just smiled again at your friend. "It wasn't a secret. I just don't talk a lot about it," you said, sitting back down at your desk, which was directly across from Spencer. "Why'd you tell it this time? Actually," you shook your head. "I think this was your first time telling the story. Does everyone know now?"

Spencer stared at you, dumbfounded. 

You just smiled at him. "Everyone has to have some tragic backstory, right? I mean, why the hell not?"

"I... I suppose you're right," he blushed, looking away from you. 

You let out a soft laugh. "But really. I don't date because of that, but it's not like I wouldn't. If I liked someone I trusted enough, I really would."

Spencer perked up a little bit at that, but he didn't say anything else. He did just tell JJ that he wasn't about to ask you on a date—he still had to work up the courage to do so. But hearing that, even after your tragic background, made his heart a little sounder. It still didn't erase the fact that he was totally baffled by how strong of an individual you are, but that is a story for another time. 


	11. my universe

_**"and i realized, at that exact moment, he was no longer my world. he was my entire universe." [unknown]** _

* * *

It took maybe just a second of looking at you and Aaron to realize that the two of you were meant to be together. But there was a part of you that always doubted it. You knew that a piece of him always held onto Haley. And you were never upset about that—she was the love of his life. You were just the woman that came after her. You came after the high school sweethearts, the child that was born out of so much love. 

And you loved Jack like he was your own child. You always made sure that he felt it. And you always made sure that Aaron felt that, as well. 

It was halfway into the third year of your relationship when he realized that, perhaps, he loved you in a different way than he loved Haley. But perhaps, more than he loved Haley. Haley was his first love—but he felt like everything that had happened in his life happened so that he could fall in love with you. 

Jack had just turned seven that past weekend. You had taken both him and Aaron to the zoo, and then out for frozen yogurt, making sure that Jack got the biggest size possible. After that, you all had a pizza movie night at Aaron and Jack's home. Jack had pulled you to the side, his hands holding onto yours. You bent down to hear him, all smiles until he spoke. 

"[Your nickname], I know that I have another mommy," he began, catching Aaron's attention as well. "But do you think I could call you mommy? I... I want to if that's okay."

Your eyes widened as you stared at the boy for a moment. You looked over at Aaron, watching him nod, and you quickly smiled at Jack. "I would love for you to call me that!" you said. You hugged the little boy who hugged you back, just as tight. 

A couple of hours later, you had tucked Jack in and then went back to the living room to help Aaron clean up. When you got there, he took your hands, preventing you from cleaning up. He had tears in his eyes, and you weren't sure if they were sad or happy until he hugged you. When you hugged back, he spoke. 

"I love you."

You broke out into a big smile, hugging him back. You said it often to each other. But at this moment, you knew that his words were more than true. You knew that he meant everything with those three little words. 

He pulled back slightly, just to look at you. "I want you to marry me."

Your eyes widened as you looked up at him and you let out a laugh, quickly nodding. You kissed his cheek. "Of course, Aaron..."

"I don't have a ring. I just... I just needed to ask you. I needed to hear your answer."

You grinned, cupping his cheeks in your hands. "I don't need a ring. I just need you, and Jack."

He began to smile in return, kissing your forehead. "You... I... You are my entire world, [Your name]. Hell, my universe. Please don't forget that. I know that I can be distant and busy, but—"

"—I'm here for you. All of you. Distance, busyness, everything. Don't worry about that." You couldn't help your blush as you hugged onto your boyfriend—or should I say, fiancé—once more. 

In just a few moments of talking, Aaron was able to dissolve all of your worries, and even all of his. He was finally able to move on from Haley and realize how good he had it with you, right in front of him. 


End file.
